Nice Surprises

I was in the psyc lounge reading before class, and I had finished the massive chapter on the difficultly of naming learning disabilities so I went outside to smoke.  And I got a voicemail, and it was from Nathan.  

I thought that he was already in Japan, I did not realize how much I had missed talking to him.  And apparently I am one of the few people he wants to keep in contact with, I did not know I meant that much to him.  I am in his top five, that means so much to me.  But then again, we have been friends since middle school.  I am so excited for him and the experience he is about to have.  I am jealous actually.  I want to go spend two years in a foreign country.  He is going to change so much, and he went through miraculous changes in college.  

So I have to go home this weekend, I am going to help Michelle in Hillsville Virginia.  It is this huge flea market kind of thing and she has a booth, and so Mom and I are going to go up and help her Friday.  Since I am going to be home this Thursday I might get to see Nathan before he leaves for Japan.  That will be one good thing.

Old friends

So I had a weird experience the other week.  

I was in bed in Wilkes and my cell rings.  I was just getting up to get ready for work, and when I read the caller ID, I almost dropped the phone.  Wade called me.  I answered, but was in shock.  I did not know why.  And I still don't.

He is going to Western now, and just wanted to know if I was still in Asheville.  I wanted to hang out.  So I called him when I got back to Asheville.  And then last night we hung out.

I was nervous and sacred.  I did not know what to expect.  He was so cruel to me, but I have forgiven him, and thought that maybe he had changed.  And to my disappointment he had not.

He was still the same.  Still doing the same shit that I could not stand 3 years ago.  It was a superficial evening.  I did not feel any connection to him, I did not feel that he trusts me anymore than I can trust him.  Sure he divulged personal details from his life in the last 3 years, but I felt he did it to check my response, not to share with me or mend broken ties.  It was just because he was near Asheville.

I will never be close to him again, and I am surprising ok with that.  There was a time in my life when I thought that we would be friends forever, and now, he is just some guy I went to high school with.  No big deal.  I like that I can talk to him and it not hurt.  But the trust is gone, and I don't think that I will ever let it sneak back into my life.

He will forever be superficial friend, an old memory.